Dealing with posers

[rw4th]

Hi,

This my first official post to this list. I’d like to get the opinion of some people out there on how to deal with posers.

I have a friend who likes to tell people he was in the military. He’s really touchy on the subject because he’s built up this whole persona around it, to the point where I think he believes it himself.

It really never bothered me before until I became aware to what point he lied to people. I have caught him using some of my war stories, and dropping names from things he’s heard from me or other people say to make himself sound legit. It’s gotten to the point where he tried to insert himself into discussion I had recently when I met up with some old buddies from one of my UN tours.

He did join the militia at some point, but dropped out after 1 or 2 weekends. Later he joined the regs and dropped out of recruit training (although he never admitted dropping out, he made up some story concerning his eyesight).

Most of the people around him have had some sort of military service (including his father). The thing is, none of us were anything special. I was in the militia for 8 years, and another friend who was in the reserves with me, then went regular force PPCLI, and now is an F-18 mechanic in the Air Force. His father was in the regs for 3 years (EME I think) in his youth.

I have warned him before about this, but he’s ignored the warning and I’m starting to find it intolerable. Should I just burst his bubble and bust him. I’m sure this would humiliate him, and I’d like to avoid that, or should I just tolerate him.

Has anybody else ever had to deal with this shit? Man, you’d expect somebody to lie about being in JTF or being a sniper or something, but lying about being in the militia? WTF

[TonyM]

Man, that's gotta be the most in-fukin'-credible story I've ever heard on SOCNET about a poser. I have no idea what to tell you, I mean, posing as a Mo? I've heard of some guys posing as SEALS, SF, Rangers (now that Blackhawk Down is a movie), etc for the "glory" or "I'm a super-secret trained killer" fantasy aspect, but what can someone gain by pretending to be in the Militia?
I got an idea, talk to a recruiter. They might sign him up again if he's that keen on it.

[rw4th]

Well that’s the funny part. He keeps going to the recruiting center, getting the paperwork, and then finding some reason why he can’t go. He’s done this 2 or 3 times now. Even went through a PT test, and I’m pretty sure he died after running the 2.4k in something like 20 mins (he’s not fat, just am out of shape chain smoker). It’s not as if he has other pressing engagements, he works a menial job, at has very few family ties.

Here’s something to add to the sadness. He became a Navy League officer, and starting wearing his uniform around to bars, telling people he’s a real Navy officer.

And yeah, posing as a mo is pretty sad. That’s why I’m conflicted about busting him publicly; it would like kicking an injured dog.

[Biker B]

These types of people amaze me. Anyone seen the Viz Comic's Aldridge Prior, the Compulsive Liar? Don't these people know that they can get their asses kicked telling bullshit stories, wearing unit shirts, wings,and medals they're not entitled to? In some cases, you might as well try to walk into an airplane propellor blade or pass yourself off as a Hells Angel at one of their swap meets for the good it will do you.

Some tough medicine might be in order with your friend. I've seen a few posers over the years, but a couple always leap to mind. One guy I encountered wore an Airborne Regiment TShirt but couldn't name which commando he served with (unless there really was an Delta Commando in the Airborne)and another claimed to be in Bosnia around the same time I was but didn't know any place names apart from Sarajevo or the name of the units that made up the battle group. I've also encountered a real annoying poseur in the form of a relative who is a gun nut. The moron couldn't hump a ruck across the street if his life depended on it but he really thinks he's something because he owns a couple of assault rifles. I've never had problems expressing my contempt for him regardless of who else is in the room as he really pisses me off.

Something to think about: it might be only a matter of time before a genuinely interested party such as a member of the media or a potential recruit talks to your friend. If he keeps up with this charade, I recommend that you [tactfully] press him for details whenever he opens his mouth. That way he might be shamed into shutting up. If he keeps it up, you'll just have to confront him for his own good, as well as the good of the units he claims to represent.

[TonyM]

Out of curiosity, which units does he claim to be/been part of? Which ROTOs? Tell him that the military community in Canada is very small. Everyone knows someone who knows someone who knows the person you're talking about.

[rw4th]

What unit, well that depends weather or not he’s posing as ex-militia or ex-navy.

When he’s posing as ex-militia he usually tells people he was in the Blackwatch. He knows just enough names and stories to sound legit. Plus he actually joined the Watch for a few weeks before quitting. As for the ex-yugo stuff, I didn’t hear him directly (he knows I wouldn’t hesitate to rip him apart on the spot). I just had a common acquaintance come up to me at a party and ask if I was in Bosnia at the same time as him, after which my friend promptly changed the subject and lead him away.

When he’s posing as ex-navy, he’s a bit more vague. I’ve heard him throw HMCS Montreal around a couple of times. I though he was busted when a woman he though he was impressing started asking whether he was served in surface or sub-surface, but he managed to change the subject and walk away.

The thing is he’s heard enough people around him telling stories in their drunken stupor (they always seem to come out when I’m drunk) to have enough ammo to appear legit. And nobody ever presses him. I mean who would lie about being a mo right?

[enderr]

Whaa!!! If this guy is gonna pose as mo' he should at least say he was a airborne, ranger, pathfinder in the QOR.. And he was so shit hot that when he went over seas he went with the JTF contingent. Jeez, if you've got the balls to be a poser then you should at least get creative... I tell chicks I'm a sky marshall.:D NOT!! Well, not yet....

[Infanteer]

Why are we having this debate? Tell this loser to shut the fuck up for his own good before someone calls his bullshit story and lays the boots to him.
You guys should have seen the fag in the legion on remeberance day. He was wearing a 75th sweater and had a set of American jump wings. Started coining the JR's when we rolled in with some bullshit coin. Some of the NCO's in the building who had served with the Westie jump company found out and counter-coined the dude. He than admitted the coin was not his and that he had never been in ANY military. Needless to say, it was fun watching 15 dudes in DEU's "toss" this fag and his buddy out of the legion.

The moral of my story...posers are cowards, tell him to shutup or sort him out before someone else does.

[rw4th]

Ok, I guess I’m not overreacting about this. I’m just going to have to be tactful about it (I though I might be overreacting given the lameness of his act). BTW, he is the kind of guy that likes to hang around legions on Remembrance Day, posing as something.

He may be acting like a total moron, but he’s built up such a persona around his lies, that I’m afraid that when I burst his bubble he’ll go postal on me, and I don’t want to have to kick his ass (that whole puppy thing again).

Thanks for the advice.

[Per Ardua]

Not only does this poser belittle himself by acting as though he was a BTDT but he belittles the good names of those men and women who had the balls to join up and make a career of the military. If John Q gets the idea that this dough hole is what your average soldier/sailor actually is then we who serve are being lowered in their eyes. I say that whenever and wherever one finds a poser they should be called on the mat and be made to put up or shut up. :mad:
Anyone who aint got the cojones to join MY military but tries to pass himself off as a super soldier needs filling in

[enderr]

Well, since he's so knowledgeable about the military....ask him if he is aware of the term "bootfuck". If he doesn't get the hint let him know that not a lot of people are as civil as you are, and would happily demonstrate the term to him.
I don't think he'll go postal...remember what posers are: all talk, no balls.

[GreenSlime]

He is scum. Treat him as such.

NOTE: Clean off your boots after doing the cha-cha on his pathetic little body.

[rw4th]

Ok, maybe somebody in the know can clear something up for me. When my friend went to St-Jean, his claim is that he was medically discharged because of his eyesight. It is a fact that the CF changed their minimum eyesight requirement while he was in St-Jean (to a level that he did not meet). Would they actually pull somebody out of basic because of this?

I always though policy changes like that only affected new applicants. Once you singed on the dotted line, you were pretty much beyond them.